


The one where Geri and Sergio are in kindergarten

by amerasu1013 (amerasu_1013)



Series: Football One-shots [5]
Category: Men's Football RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Kindergarten & Pre-school, Fighting, Gen, Iker has a potty mouth, Kindergarten, Sergio and Geri as kids, and then getting along, because of course, maaaybe, slight language warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-17
Updated: 2019-11-17
Packaged: 2021-01-21 12:53:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21299771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amerasu_1013/pseuds/amerasu1013
Summary: “Luis always bites people and he never gets a time-out!” Sergio complains and tries to get around Iker. “Why do I have to be here!”Iker sighs and prods Sergio back into the time-out chair. “Luis has a condition.” He explains, not for the first time. “He can’t help it. Whereas you’re just being a brat.”Sergio scowls mightily and crosses his tiny arms. “It’s not fair.” He repeats stubbornly. “Geri started it!”Iker manfully refrains from rolling his eyes. “This time, maybe. But last time you started it. Sese, why can’t you two just get along?”[The one where Sergio and Geri fight and Sergio gets a time-out. Geri makes things better. Maybe. And Iker's nerves are getting very frayed.]
Relationships: Gerard Piqué & Sergio Ramos, Iker Casillas & Sergio Ramos
Series: Football One-shots [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1514957
Comments: 3
Kudos: 26





	The one where Geri and Sergio are in kindergarten

**Author's Note:**

> Many thanks once again to the wonderful [zilldk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zilldk/pseuds/zilldk) for betaing... Any remaining mistakes are mine, so please point them out. English is not my native tongue.  
And btw: I don't really know much about the Spanish education system and was too lazy to research, so I just went with how we do it here. It should still work, but any Spanish readers or readers who know more about Spanish kindergarten than I do, please don't be offended...

“Luis _ always _ bites people and he _ never _ gets a time-out!” Sergio complains and tries to get around Iker. “Why do _ I _ have to be here!”

Iker sighs and prods Sergio back into the time-out chair. “Luis has a _ condition _.” He explains, not for the first time. “He can’t help it. Whereas you’re just being a brat.”

Sergio scowls mightily and crosses his tiny arms. “It’s not _ fair _.” He repeats stubbornly. “Geri started it!”

Iker manfully refrains from rolling his eyes. “This time, maybe. But last time _ you _started it. Sese, why can’t you two just get along?”

Sergio’s scowl deepens. “’cause he’s a stupidface.” He mutters mutinously and glares over at Geri in the opposite corner.

Iker looks over too. The other boy glares back at Sergio and it seems only Iniesta’s hand on his head is keeping him from storming over to continue their fight from earlier. The two teachers share an eye roll. ‘Become a kindergartener’, they said. ‘Little kids are so easy to deal with’, they said. Yeah, _ right _. Not these two little demons…

Iker was distracted only for a few seconds and when he turns back he only _ just _ manages to catch Sergio by the back of his pants before the boy can dart off. Iker sighs and pulls him back, unceremoniously dumping him onto the chair again. Sergio scowls up at him, Iker’s not sure if he’s more annoyed at having to sit here or at being caught trying to get away. Doesn’t really matter either way though, because for the next 15 minutes, his little bum is going to stay _ put _.

“Sit down.” Iker says sternly and gives Sergio his best Teacher Glare. “Or I’ll add another 15 minutes to your time-out and I won’t play football with you anymore.”

That will do the trick, Iker thinks with no small amount of relief when Sergio’s eyes become big and horrified. The boy is a tiny menace, but threatening to take away football always works and –

Sergio bursts into tears.

Shit.

Not just tears either, big gulping sobs of pure misery, Sergio curling in on himself and almost falling off the chair with the force of his apparent anguish. Iker sighs and, not for the first time, wishes he had just gone on to become an accountant. He loves kids, he really does, but right now a nice, boring desk job sounds _ so _ much better.

“Sergio.” He says. The boy continues to sob. “Sergio.” Iker tries again, but Sergio just curls up even tighter and cries his tiny heart out. Iker sighs heavily and sits down to pull the boy into his lap. Sergio clutches at Iker’s shirt (yay, there goes another one, it’ll be all wet and gross and Iker really needs to start bringing a change of clothes to work) and bawls into Iker’s neck. It’s wet and, indeed, gross. Iker sighs and rocks the boy a little, making soothing noises. “Hey now, come on. Stop that, you’re gonna make me sad too.” And _ wet _ . And _ gross _.

“I w-wanna play _ football _ !” Sergio sobs and curls tighter into Iker’s embrace. “You s-said I was gonna win the W-world Cup and I nee-ee-eed to _ practice _!”

Iker makes a face, feeling a little guilty. Over in the other corner Iniesta meets his eyes and gives a small shrug. Geri, leaning against his leg now, is no longer scowling and instead looks confused. Iker sighs and focuses back on Sergio. “I did say that, yes. But just because you don’t get to practice today, doesn’t mean-”

“NO!” Sergio wails and beats a tiny fist against Iker’s chest. “You’re not gonna _ play _ with me anymore!”

Oh, that. Right. “I just meant not _ today _.” Iker explains. “I’m still gonna play with you tomorrow.”

Sergio sniffles, but thankfully stops crying. Instead he looks up at Iker from big, wet, hopeful eyes (making Iker feel like the most horrible person on _ earth _ , when he was just trying to do his _ job _, damn it). “Promise? Tomorrow and all the days after?”

Iker hides a smile and nods. It’s cute how determined the boy is to always play with Iker, even if he never lets him do anything but be the keeper while Sergio tries to score ‘pennities’. “Promise.”

Sergio’s eyes seem to get even bigger. “_ Promise _ promise?”

Iker nods solemnly. “Promise promise. But you have to be good and stay here on the chair for 15 minutes, okay? And not get up or try to get away or get toys so you have something to play with. You stay here and _ don’t _ play and instead think about how it’s wrong to bite people. And when you do that, Sese, then I promise I will play with you tomorrow and all the days after until you win the World Cup. Well. Unless you bite someone again, okay? Because that’s _ mean _, and mean boys don’t get to play football.”

Sergio’s forehead wrinkles while he thinks it over. “Okay.” He mutters and wipes his nose with his hands, then smears the… _ wetness _all over his shirt. And arms. Iker’s going to have to give him a bath later, hooray. “No more biting, I promise. Not even Geri, even if he’s stupid.”

They really need to talk about this whole calling people stupid thing, Iker thinks. But not right now - baby steps. “Okay, Sese, thank you. And hey, you can always play football with someone else, too, you know?”

Sergio looks suspicious. “Like _ who _?”

Iker’s about to suggest asking the other kids, but before he can another young voice pipes up. “I like football!”

Iker turns around, Geri’s standing next to him now and looking at Sergio curiously. Sergio, of course, scowls back and sticks out his tongue. “You’re stu-” He begins, but at Iker’s stern look breaks off with a giant annoyed huff.

Geri doesn’t seem to have noticed, he’s still eyeing Sergio curiously. “You’re crying.” He notes and cocks his head. “You’re crying like a baby, I can see it.”

Sergio pulls up to his full (very short) height. “Am _ not _!” He declares and crosses his arms.

“Are too!” Geri insists and leans forward to poke at Sergio’s still wet cheeks. “You’re _ crying _!”

Sergio waves his arms to dislodge the taller boy’s fingers. “Am _ not _!” He insists stubbornly and, oh damn, Iker can see his lower lip start to quiver - any second now there will be tears again. He tugs Geri backwards to get him off Sergio.

“Leave him alone, Geri. He’s upset, don’t be mean.”

Geri makes a face (Sergio makes one right back) but acquiesces, watching Sergio curiously. “Why are you crying?”

Sergio scowls mightily. “Senor Iker won’t play football with me!”

Sure, yeah, of course. Blame Iker. It’s not like there’s anyone else to blame, for example boys who bite other boys. Geri had to get a _ bandaid _ , for Christ’s sake. Sergio has _ sharp _little teeth.

“Why?” Geri asks curiously and inches a little closer to Sergio. Iker lets him because, right now at least, he doesn’t seem like he’s going to start pulling on Sergio’s hair again, which is how they all got into this mess in the first place.

“‘cause I bit you!” Sergio says, his glare lessening. Maybe he does feel a little bit guilty after all? If so, Iker will feel very proud of his teacher skills...

Geri cocks his head and mulls it over. “That’s not a reason.” He decides then and throws Iker an accusing look. “Little kids bite people, they can’t help it, Luis’ Mama said so, and Sergio’s still little. You should let him play football. Or else you’re _ mean _.”

“Yeah!” Sergio says hotly (apparently ignoring the whole him being called a ‘little kid’ thing, which usually he gets very offended by) and glares at Iker, puffing up with the important feeling of suddenly having someone on his side - the same someone he _ bit _ earlier, by the way, in case someone has forgotten. _ Iker _hasn’t! “Mean!”

“Watch it.” Iker says drily and gets up, dusting off his jeans. It doesn’t seem like Sergio’s about to try to run away again and, for now at least, Geri seems unlikely to pester him again. Instead they seem to almost get along, now that they’ve bonded over how _ mean _ Iker is being… He turns to Iniesta to see if his colleague agrees that maybe, just _ maybe _Sergio’s time-out could be shortened to only ten minutes, but, hooray, Iniesta left him alone to deal with this mess. Bastard. 

There’s a sudden giggle behind Iker’s back and when he turns back to the boys, Geri slaps his hands over his mouth, eyes wide and mischievous, while Sergio clutches the chair, giggling. Iker gets the feeling Geri just stuck out his tongue at Iker’s back. He raises an eyebrow - that’s right, I know what you did! - but decides to let it slide. Bonding over how mean Iker is, right? That can only be good for these two. Way better than the constant fighting.

“Come on, Geri. Go play outside with the others, you can talk to Sergio again after his time-out.”

Sergio’s giggling stops and he starts scowling again. Geri lowers his hands and frowns. “You said no toys!” He points out and huh, apparently at least _ someone _was listening to Iker earlier. “You said no toys and no playing but you didn’t say no other people and talking isn’t playing and I’m not a toy so I get to stay and talk!”

Sergio’s nose scrunches as he tries to follow the train of logic, then his face clears and he nods rapidly. “Yeah!”

“No, that’s not happening, this is supposed to be a punishment -” Iker says, but before he can finish, Sergio has reached for Geri’s hand to hold it tightly.

Geri throws him a surprised look, but then raises their joined hands to wave them (accusingly?) at Iker. “Leave him alone! He’s upset and don’t be mean!”

He throws Sergio another look who, as if on cue, lets his lower lip wobble dramatically and scrunches up his face as if he’s about to cry. His eyes, however, remain dry. Iker stares, not sure if he’s more offended at them trying to play him like that (and at Geri throwing his own words back into his face!) or impressed by them _ teaming up _ like that. How did this even happen? Fifteen minutes ago Sergio was trying to rip chunks out of Geri with his teeth and now…

Iker stares at them. Geri glares back. Sergio lets his face crumple into a dramatic expression of anguish. Iker stares some more. Well. Alright then. He knows when he’s been beaten.

He’s barely walked a few steps when there’s another giggle behind his back - and this time it’s Sergio with the mischievous eyes and the hands over his mouth to pretend he hasn’t just stuck out his tongue at Iker and Geri giggling wildly next to him. Seriously, Iker thinks and walks off, shaking his head. He should have become an _ accountant _.

It’s kind of sweet, though. These two who so far were always at each other’s throats, now suddenly sitting in the time-out zone together, chatting happily. Maybe they just needed a common goal - or a common enemy, as it were? As long as it means they won’t try to bite each other anymore, Iker can be that enemy, no problem. It really is kind of sweet, isn’t it? He’ll leave them be… Well. He’ll keep an eye on them anyway, just in case.

Five minutes later there’s a furious shriek from the corner and when Iker looks over, there’s Geri and Sergio, rolling around on the floor, kicking and punching at each other. It seems they’re yelling about which one of them will get to win the World Cup… Iker sighs and gets up to deal with the new situation. And he’d almost thought they really _ would _get along now… Well, it was probably too good to be true.

He _ really _should have become an accountant.

THE END

**Author's Note:**

> And they fought happily ever after until they won the World Cup.
> 
> PS: There will be grown-up, serious, "proper" stories too, I promise. Eventually. Maybe even one with proper chapters and something like a plot. I have something cooking, at least. We'll see...


End file.
